Tears

I just want to throw my hands up and say I quit life in general but I know I can't do that.

Life is sometimes tough to handle especially without the ones that mean the most to you.

It's hard to think about what can be gained when all you can think about what you've lost.

I just want to cry and I'm so close to it sometimes I have to just take a few deep breaths.

On monday I meet with a counselor and I don't know if I can disclose much of anything other then my brothers passing. I feel like it's going to be a tug-a-war to pull some things out and I don't know what good it will do to just lie. I feel like a mess-I'm having trouble sleeping again and I'll probably be diagnosed with depression.

I want to go for a run but it's still dark out and I don't have a mp3 player to go running with.... I need to breathe. I've had an ice tea and I'm going to do a flush again today. I did one yesterday but forgot to mention it. Probably around 7, 7:30 I'll walk to where I work and get some coffee.